In my almost twenty eight years I've had many jobs. I worked on a ranch picking rocks and changing sprinklers from the time I was nine until I got my first full time job as a Surveyors assistant. I also wrangled horses, worked with people with disabilities, PA'd and extra'd for a movie, and worked in a department store. Of all the jobs I've ever had my current one is the absolute hardest. Being a Mom can be one of the most agonizing tasks. There are days when I go to bed at night and think "did I do anything right today?"
Those of you who are parents and especially those with multiple children will understand this thought. Those without children just imagine your most trying physical thing add your most trying mental experience and times by your most trying spiritual experience and you'll be able to see why it's difficult.
Today I probably messed up a ton. I was tired to begin with and between the dr. office being behind, shots, colds, diarrhea, blood draws, an almost four year old that refuses to potty train, a six year old that thinks he knows it all, and a house that is suffering from post weekend stress syndrome I basically lost it by the end of the day. As I thought about how to make myself feel better the only thing that came to mind was to write it out so that my thoughts might help someone else.
What thoughts you might ask. Up to now it's been quite depressing. Well here we go.
I have a few things that I remind myself of when things get really tough and I thought I'd share them.
1. Everyone has an off day. I think that's why God created days. If life were just one continuous day we would be so depressed and only see our imperfections. Luckily tomorrow is a new day. We can wake up and start a new. I take that opportunity as much as I can.
2. Just because I reprimand my children does not make me a bad parent. Even God gets upset with us. This doesn't give me free reign to do what ever I want it just lets me put things into perspective.
3. REPENTANCE. we all need it and by using it we all become better.
4. I have the right to receive revelation on how to raise my children. This is a right that is only shared with my husband. No one else has that right. So when I feel like everyone is telling me I'm doing a bad job by telling me what I can do different I just remind myself that I'm the parent and I know my children better then they do. This does not mean that I don't take advice when it is good it just means I don't let people boss me into taking what they think is a suggestion but is sometimes a command.
5. Forgiveness! I am forgiven and I need to forgive my children and others. Often times at the end of the day I'm so angry at my children for there disobedience that it's hard to love and be nice to them. Then I think of how God probably feels towards me. I know that he forgives me and that I've probably made just as many mistakes in the day as my kids. So I tell them I'm sorry for what I've done wrong. This can be very powerful in our relationship because it helps them to say they are sorry when they do something that is not right.
6. Prayer is my biggest solace. I ask God to make me a better mom then I could ever be on my own. I ask him to give me more patience then I feel I have, and I ask him to help me not be pig-headed and to see and accept my answers when they come. Whether this is through another person or something I read or just simple words from my kids I try to let it sink in when it comes.
7. Rash judgement is not good judgement. I have to learn to let things go. Sometimes I delve out a punishment because I'm angry and that is not the way the Lord wants it to be. So at night when things are calmer I think it through. Then in the morning I can discuss it with my kids.
Last but not least I look at my children sleeping and realize that if I was gone tomorrow I would never want them to think ill of me. So I promise myself that I will tell them I love them and give them hugs and kisses before they go to sleep so that hopefully in the end they will only remember that. Thank goodness we don't remember everything from our childhood.
I hope this entry at least helps someone out there know that they are not alone and that there is hope when you feel like your job ( as a mom or anything else) is more then you can handle in a day. Good Luck and May God Bless us All.
1 comment:
I found your blog through facebook, and let me tell you, I needed to hear a lot of that today. I was very touched. I feel so much like you. I don't have multiples, but 4 kids that are 5 and under feels like some days might just kill me. And then I feel so bad for being the worst mother in the world because I am tired and have no patience. Thanks, Teah for your thoughts.
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